Nothing funnier than watching a media caught scrambling to cover their messes. It’s like watching a cat doing somersaults in a litter box.
Take CNN, the conspiracy nut network, which spent four years pushing the collusion hoax, calling anyone who disagreed with them a bigot. They flooded the media zone with impeachment theatre – an anti-Trump hysteria that kept everyone busy, as the coronavirus spread. Their emotional despair over Trump pushed the most destructive manmade disaster in history into a dark corner where it blossomed like a pot plant in Kat’s bedroom window. And when the virus took off – the media, along with the WHO concluded it wasn’t a lab leak, before they’d seriously investigated it.
They labeled it a looney conspiracy theory because like the NBA, they’d rather rip Trump than offend China. So now, what do these clowns do when that narrative has collapsed? I don’t think they’d blame Trump, do you?
CNN’s Brianna Keilar: And for former president Donald Trump, the lab leak theory “was less about finding the truth and more about finding a scapegoat as he made racist comments deflecting from his own poor political performance and coincided with higher rates of hate crimes against Asian Americans.”
That sounds an awful lot like a defensive dodge: “Sure we were wrong, but it doesn’t matter cuz the guy who’s right is a big meanie!!” But – just for fun: let’s pretend this is the one time CNN is right. Can’t a president be wrong – and the media still investigate a legitimate story – simultaneously? Even if their opinion is true about Trump – it doesn’t explain why the media didn’t do its job. The lab leak theory was more plausible than blaming a wet market pangolin – but it was portrayed like it came from Alex Jones’ dream diary.
That’s on the news. That’s not on Trump. Now I don’t claim to be Edward R. Murrow. I’m closer to Edward Munster—in height and we both wear black shorts. But even as a commentator I’m way more objective than these bitter spinsters. And I let you know when I’m talking out of my butt. CNN can’t do that – because it’s all butt, all the time. Look at their lineup – it’s a whole lotta crack.
And when I say broken – I mean really, they’re actually broken. The Trump era caused an entire news network to fall apart like a perfectly cooked pork shoulder. Or a wet burrito. As you can tell, I’m hungry. But at least I’m not thirsty. Like this fella –
CNN’s Chris Cuomo, 5/25: But on the right, they’re all about it. Why? Because the more that this is about china being sneaky, the less it is about our leadership failing under Trump. So the bi-product of that is what? Fueling hate toward innocent people of Asian descent. You know that’s a reason why we’ve had an uptick in assaults, but it’s all about the game.
He really is morphing into Ron Burgundy. I apologize to Ron Burgundy, a fictitious character. But again – even if he was right about Trump’s intentions – which he isn’t – it’s irrelevant. You should still investigate a plausible cause to the worst medical disaster since Gerald Nadler’s tummy tuck. Instead, these bozos link the calls for investigating the lab to Asian hate crime.
Sorry – increases in crime came from a decrease in accountability following the defund the police push. No bail. Early releases due to COVID. Cities no longer prosecuting theft. Unstable characters on empty streets targeting the old and vulnerable. And Cuomo thinks it has to do with Trump. How long before they tell us he was on the grassy knoll in Dallas? How long before they tell us he killed Kurt Cobain? Maybe he’s deflecting blame from his brother again.
But this is what happens when you have only one tool in the tool kit. And you got a tool operating it. What these dopes are saying is purely based on their residual Trump derangement. It doesn’t matter if Trump was onto something — his intent was bad, so that’s enough to ignore it. CNN wasn’t alone. Other people mocked the theory only cuz Trump and Pompeo were onto it early. They’re literally explaining to you how media prejudice against Trump biased their coverage. Because the more it’s China’s fault the less they can blame Trump.
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Now, I’ll admit Trump has said some crazy stuff. But when he was right, he was right. On the big stuff – from the vaccines to China to the Middle East – hell – to running for president in the first place. He’s got a way better track record than our gloriously awful media. So you wanna talk deflection? Now we’re being told that the Biden White House shut down an inquiry into the theory that China’s bioweapon program may have played a role in unleashing this pandemic. Why? Well, it was – launched by Trump administration. Isn’t that reason enough?
Instead, what do they want to investigate? What really went down on January 6th! Yeah, cuz the media hasn’t squeezed enough feverish content out of that story. So rather than investigate what could have killed millions of people, they want to relive January 6th for their own amusement. Which means, if and when another lab experiment goes bad – who can we blame then? Like a portable toilet, it’s best if you don’t look into it.
This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld’s opening monologue on the May 26, 2021 edition of “Gutfeld!”